Dear bloggie,

I remembered promising you more happy posts on your 3rd birthday. I'm so sorry things turn out like that.. :( .. Not sure how long more I will take to get over all these shit but I'll try okaye?.. ASAP! :)

Regarding last night, I finally took out the courage to thrash things out.
I told him say I needed an answer so that I can decide if I should move on or not.
He seems to be rushing off for dinner with the rest of the class, so I didn't want an answer immediately.
And after that I smsed him, ".. if after thinking through and you feel that you don't want to be serious, then don't mislead me already okay?.."
I feel so relieved after saying these out, but gotta mentally prepare myself for the worst.. The most depress for another few days?.. =/
But anw, I hope he'll be honest, I'm not so gullible, so don't bullshit and try to lie and say things to make me feel better..

.. And Azmi rocks! :) .. He's my big bro in class :).. always been here with me all these while. Thanks bro! You're the best laaa :)

Meanwhile, I can only pray that I'll be blessed with the ability to get over all these ASAP.
ASAP ASAP ASAP!!
Please bless me the energy to chiong my school work and projects and do well for them!

Sigh. Suddenly, I feel that my world is so complicated.
And as much as I don't wanna believe it, I think I'm suffering from *depression.

I miss sotsot-ing, jumping around, looking forward to everyday, talking crap, etcetcetc..
I just wanna be happy lar. :(



*minz

*WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS OF DEPRESSION?
The following are the most common symptoms of depression. If you experience 5 or more of these symptoms for 2 weeks or longer, you are probably depressed.

• Persistent sadness or feeling down or gloomy
  
• A loss of interest in activities previously enjoyed, such as socializing with friends and family, most of the day, nearly every day.
  
• Loss of appetite and loss of weight.
  
• Insomnia. For some people, on the contrary, they find that they are sleeping more than normal.
  
• Feeling restless and agitated more easily.
  
• Feeling tired and having little energy.
  
• Unable to concentrate and think clearly and thereby becoming indecisive.
  
• Feeling of worthlessness and quilt
  
• Recurrent thoughts of death

http://www.imh.com.sg/patient_education/depression.htm